i dont know where to start so lets start by just saying that im terrible... yeah that pretty much covers it without the details because yeah, ill do the POSTIVE PARTS OF MY LIFE! im so thankfull to have such an amazing friend like maddie <3 shes always there has PATIENCE! ALOT OF PATIENCE! WITH ME! even when i walk off and leave her after i feel really bad and wonder why i still have her maddie you are so amazing missy in every single way and i love you to pieces! so thank you blue eyes for bieng that amazing friend that i girl like me must have <3 i consider myslef very lucky :D..... so me and a friend arent friends anymore and its wierd cause i have to see him still:S all i can say about you.... you know who youare is that i love i love you i love you.... this was the dream i had last night....- i was boiling my eyes out running through the school (no idea why) and then you saw me and i looked into your flower eyes and kept on running and reminded myself that you didnt care... so i ran... you came after me and held me when i was crying on the floor you just held me and didnt let go... kissed me on the forhead and told me that you were here with me till the day i die... you held me tight and said there was nothing to be sared off because you would always be right next to me and always there to dry my tears...
yeah as you probobally guessed i was crying when i woke up... you said you would always care... you said that you would always dry my tears, love you till the day i die... how silly of me i just wish you still cared and f about me ...
girls say to there friends that he doesnt deserve your tears... he does deserve mine.... partly because i cant stop them....
ok so im on my depressing diet were i dont eat anything! this is day to ive had a sanwhich over two days lets see what happens tommorow because hopefully i just drop dead... that will put me out of my mysery :)
so many things in life latley are soo caotic:S
SO MUCH HOMEWORK..  i get really stressed out about all that sort of stuff...
then there boys... why were they ever invented? god? hello? ohh hello tahlia yes they were invented for marriage blah blah but god ... there isnt a guy out there for me... and the one i want yeahh you understand you can understand my thoughts... tahlia there is a guy for you he is waiting for you just waiting he feels the same as you do know... say wht? tahlia remember when you were staring out the window yesterday night while everyone else was having h.j;s? wondering why life is so cruel and the world is so big why cant i find anyone? WELL THERE IS SOMEONE FOR YOU TAHLIA :)

I KNOW I KNOW IM AN IDIOT! its just a day dream i keep having... no kidding! i used to be able to read minds not joking! hmm im a freak :P well when your just over bieng depressed you turn really really really high! well wierd :S em knows about that haha yeah im out... catcha well if im still here ;P
out dr ed camp tomorrow :) should be hell :D seeing your face everyday... remember what we used to say? about us on camp :) and i hoped that we were still going out then... yeah that backfired, but seriously im done feeling like i always do everthing wrong because it just makes me feel worse and you dont even mind it...


                   chio- remember to wake up on the right side of the bed, the one with the sun streaming through your blinds onto you face having the sun light shinning on you knowing its your time to shine :)